Traffic Joke

This was forwarded to me by my father. Thought it was appropriate :)

Yesterday I had a flat tire on the interstate. So I eased my car over to the shoulder of the road, carefully get out of the car and open the trunk. I took out 2 cardboard men, unfolded them and stood them at the rear of my car facing oncoming traffic. They look so life like you wouldn't believe it! They are in trench coats exposing their nude bodies to the approaching drivers. To my surprise, cars start slowing down looking at my lifelike men which made it safer for me to work at the side of the road. And of course, traffic starts backing up. Everybody is tooting their horns and waving like crazy. It wasn't long before a state trooper pulls up behind me. He gets out of his car and starts walking towards me.. I could tell he was not a happy camper! 'What's going on here? ' 'My car has a flat tire', I said calmly. 'Well, what are those obscene cardboard men doing here by the road? ' I couldn't believe that he didn't know. So I told him, 'Helloooooo, those are my emergency flashers!'

Happy Thanksgiving!

I know Thanksgiving is the most traveled day in the entire year, but man does it make for an easy commute to work. Apparently no one is at work this week, which is great for me! Smooth sailing ahead! Now, if only they'd stay off the road for the rest of the year...

Happy early Thanksgiving to me ;) (And you too of course.)

Mantras

I was sitting in a car yesterday and the driver turns to look at the guy who won't let her merge into the straight only lane and says, "Did that make you feel better, honey?" Classic. I think that will be my new driving mantra.

Right Turn Only?

What kind of hurry do you need to be in to screech out of the regular lane to go into the right-turn-only lane to pass me in an intersection? And then give me a look like I'M the one who's crazy? You just used the turn lane as your personal traffic hopper, Mac. Get back in line!

PS. Mac was what my grandpa used to call a driver who pissed him off, since he didn't swear. Cutest thing ever.

On Ramp Perp

Where to begin...there were so many gaffes this morning, I'm just not sure which one to choose. Let's start with the one I observed from the safety of my own vehicle.

There's a point on a major freeway in San Diego where several smaller roads have to merge onto the road. Inevitably, this causes traffic to slow down since we're trying to work on that zipper effect as mentioned earlier on this blog. Of course not everyone chooses to partake in such a social norm. That's fairly status quo. However, this morning I watched a guy merge FROM the smaller road onto the on ramp by jumping over before everyone in front of him, THEN, once he had comfortably acclimated into the flow of traffic, he refused to let one of his compatriots from the smaller lane zipper in front of him. OK, I tried to draw a picture to show what happened. The guy in red is the perp. The two cars in front of him are merging onto the ramp, as they should. He, on the other hand, is going out of turn and out of the lane to get on the on ramp first. Now he's safely in the on ramp traffic, where (since he got over before the end of his ramp) he should now take his turn and let someone in from his side road. Does he do that? Of course not! He's in! That's all that matters to him. Screw the guy behind him who's turn it is to merge. I hope that makes sense. All that needs to come across is that some drivers are so selfish that they don't even realize they're screwing over the group of people they were just waiting in line with. UGH. And, I ended that sentence in a preposition. Good lord. This day is going GREAT! :)